@Chris_najdek
Cnajdek27@gmail.com
My last article seemed to be a much heralded and useful guide for many white Americans as useless calls to 911 regarding African Americans not doing anything wrong increased by 47% according to infowars.com.
However not everyone followed my guide as we saw calls for children delivering newspapers, wearing socks to the pool, and using your own pool added to the list of viral videos/news stories that wasted local law enforcement resources.
Therefore I’ve decided to expand the criteria with yet another set of 20 reasons waste local law enforcement resources by snitching to express your unrealized racism. Enjoy and please use with no discretion:
1. Showing up at 4pm for a party at noon
2. Causing us to see a movie in theaters twice so we get to hear the dialogue
3. Flooding our timeline with promises of money from Tyler Perry
4. The Shiggy Challenge
5. Skinny Jogger pants
6. Gold sneakers
7. The Black & Mild resurgence
8. Iggy Azalia
9. Insisting we already know when in actuality we don’t know at all
10. Catfish
11. Having rap names spelled like AOL instant messenger screen names
12. Increased styrofoam cup sales
13. 3 liter soda bottles
14. Maury Povich’s net worth
15. Steven Segal’s straight to dvd career
16. Riding a bike outside of the designated bicycle lane
17. Providing false confidence to Asian singers at amateur night at the Apollo
18. Nick Cannon’s radio career
19. Being friends with the girl you like at the office
20. Safari and Chris Brown’s dick pics and my new found sexual inadequacy
Use this list wisely and when you’re done I may just know of 20 reasons to call 911 on Latinos. Here’s an excerpt:
1. White socks that reach the thighs
2. Hulk Hogan mustaches
3. Directions on products at dollar stores
I can’t believe you wrote this. Even if meant to be sarcastic or satire it isn’t amusing at all
I apologize Sack Eater. I’ll be more sensitive next time.
You better, you half breed.
We prefer Bi Racial
You’re bi a lot of things.
Best damn topic
Thank you very much.