T-Mobile Arena (seriously?)
Las Vegas, NV
This damn website is a baby. It demands to be fed, it shits on my life, I think about it all the time, but I stick with it hoping it’ll pay off in 18 years.
This is me warming a bottle at 3am and sticking it down the damn thing’s throat. (Clearly, I don’t have kids.) I’ll just write a few words about a few fights so you can spend a few minutes reading. Let’s get to it!
Women’s Featherweight Cris Cyborg (c) vs. Holly Holm
I’m not sold on this being a PPV main-event but I’m interested enough in it. I’m guessing either Holm wins a decision or a late round finish and then they sell her as the woman who beat the two biggest badasses in history, etc… OR, Cyborg murders The Preacher’s Daughter and murder is always fun.
And someone pops for roids.
Lightweight Khabib Nurmagomedov vs. Edson Barboza
I get excited at the idea of Khabib fighting now, I’ll admit. The way he literally takes down everyone, breaks their will to live, and beats the fuck out of them is so much fun. Barboza is the exact opposite. You’ll hear a lot of, “A throwback to the old days, your classic Striker vs Grappler matchup” from people. It’s cliched but true.
Bantamweight Jimmie Rivera vs. ???
Rivera done got fucked by the world. From Cruz to Lineker to him spending the past few days begging Marlon Moraes to fight.
.@MMARLONMORAES @ufc pic.twitter.com/mZEQrAGSir
— Jimmie Rivera (@JimmieRivera135) December 25, 2017
I give you 5 extra fucking pounds and you can’t make weight? @MMARLONMORAES you still say no to the fight. Five extra pounds. And this after you say you want to fight me.
— Jimmie Rivera (@JimmieRivera135) December 25, 2017
Alright let’s do it, 145lb sign the contract. @MMARLONMORAES
— Jimmie Rivera (@JimmieRivera135) December 25, 2017
Let’s be clear on the situation. I’m in Vegas ready to fight. Missed Thanksgiving. Missed Christmas. Missed honeymoon. Was prepared. Was a professional. Cruz out. Lineker out. Marlon full of shit.
— Jimmie Rivera (@JimmieRivera135) December 26, 2017
.@TJDillashaw @DominickCruz @Cody_Nolove I’m ready whenever you are…
— Jimmie Rivera (@JimmieRivera135) December 26, 2017
Women’s Strawweight Cynthia Calvillo vs. Carla Esparza
Calvillo has stormed the scene, according to how I remember things. She’s kinda cute and quirky – and 30. I mention that for a few reasons: 1. I thought she was 19 or so; 2. at her age, she should be thinking about making babies not making fights. Damn women.
Esparza was the first ever UFC women’s strawweight champion (and Invicta’s!), so that’s a cool little fact for her. She then got smoked by Joanna, so that’s not a cool fact for her. She beat Rose though, so that’s another cool fact for her. I always confuse her with Tecia Torres, so I often think she’s a lesbian, so that’s a … cool fact for her? Sure!
Welterweight Carlos Condit vs. Neil Magny
YAY! Condit returns and so too does violence!
Magny isn’t that violent but should be a perfect test for where Condit is at in his career. Condit has been off for over a year and let’s hope things go better than when Maia raped his face with a choke.
Lightweight Dan Hooker vs. Marc Diakiese
This fight exists for me to make prostitution jokes.
Welterweight Kamaru Usman vs. Emil Weber Meek
I think I ranked Usman #10 to give him a little attention (I’m a trendsetter) but the dude is pretty good. He and Colby are the future of the division, apparently.
Flyweight Louis Smolka vs. Matheus Nicolau
Midgets gonna midget.
Lightweight Myles Jury vs. Rick Glenn
I like Glenn. I almost tapped him once while rolling. Good guy, really. Hard-working type. No lawyer likes juries. RIMSHOT!
Middleweight Marvin Vettori vs. Omari Akhmedov
Akhmedov probably wrestled some sorta wildlife as a child.
Light Heavyweight Khalil Rountree vs. Michał Oleksiejczuk
Rountree should spell his name “RounDtree” dammit.
Bantamweight Tim Elliott vs. Mark De La Rosa
From winning TUF and getting himself a title shot to opening a shit ass PPV: the life and times of Tim Elliott.
(Matt and I will do a proper audio preview that’ll be up tomorrow.)
UFC 219 CARD
- Women’s Featherweight Cris Cyborg (c) vs. Holly Holm
- Lightweight Khabib Nurmagomedov vs. Edson Barboza
- Bantamweight Jimmie Rivera vs. ???
- Women’s Strawweight Cynthia Calvillo vs. Carla Esparza
- Welterweight Carlos Condit vs. Neil Magny
- Lightweight Dan Hooker vs. Marc Diakiese
- Welterweight Kamaru Usman vs. Emil Weber Meek
- Flyweight Louis Smolka vs. Matheus Nicolau
- Lightweight Myles Jury vs. Rick Glenn
- Middleweight Marvin Vettori vs. Omari Akhmedov
- Light Heavyweight Khalil Rountree vs. Michał Oleksiejczuk
UFC 219 Products to Buy
